Why I reached out for help: To come to be able to trust me.
In the fairly few sessions with Dex we have resolved, handled, eliminated, illuminated, blew, understood, became responsible for, came into control of, and are a full knowingness regarding self conflict. There is no longer a self in conflict. There is me- just me.
To write more relating to this might act as a limiting thing… and could be an infinite word set.
Thank you, Dex!
— Chris D
AD has been a regular participant for over a year, she’s had great and needed changes, and she’s been remarking on how thankful she is that she could have sessions over Skype, how much better this works than to have to be in the physical presence of someone when she needs not to feel self-conscious at all about what she needs to express:
I want to share my experience of working over Skype. I’ve been working with Dex for over a year and, for many reasons, he’s by far the best counselor I’ve ever worked with. An integral part of the success of our therapeutic relationship, though, is simply due to the fact that it does not happen in person. I didn’t realize how much I’d struggled doing therapy in person until I started working with Dex; just how self conscious I felt when I had to deal with the very real presence of a person with needs of their own. I could never really relax, I could never really cry if I had to, etc. etc. because, well, there was someone sat a few feet away looking at me! And I was always in a space that was not my own. A space designed to be therapeutic but not necessarily in line with my needs.
I can express whatever I want, however I need, without having to worry about traveling after something’s shifted, without having to invest any energy into managing the reality that there’s a physical presence expressing its own energies close by. So much pressure! I always felt I had to be a good patient in some way, to show the therapist that I was transforming in front of them, that I was all ready to go by the end of the session. It was impossible for me to make progress. Working over Skype, I can choose whatever is best for me and it’s fine, it’s functional, it’s great. If I feel I can better express something if I’m not being observed, I just turn the camera away. Easy peasy! I was unsure at first working over Skype, but very quickly it became the obviously best way for me to work. And to speak to another concern I had about working over Skype: I’ve never felt worried that Dex isn’t present because he always is. Thank you, Dex!
It isn’t all that unusual in sessions for the participant to come to recognize some deep and pervasive truth, greatly changing and expanding your perspective. My clients, enjoying the freedom and convenience of working in sessions directly over the internet, come from all over this world. Chris shares a deep personal session revelation from his home in Thailand:
In relation to our session today, addressing the stabilizing of gains made:
Dex helped me to secure my source of the decision to be or not to be. I feel I know where the questioning even came from — referring to the very eloquently stated question I believe written in literature associated to the name Shakespeare.
To be or not to be is actually participate or not participate. I have left that vulnerable to condition. If a condition changed so then would the decision. If it isn’t clear yet what I’m saying, when left to condition or state of a condition – to be or not to be — then one loses the choice to the vulnerability of the state of condition… and kind of hangs one in the question of the state: Will the state change or not? So leaving the choice to the condition locks one to the condition as for attention to the condition — is it changing or not?
This win is still “fresh” and needs more “process” time but there it is stated as above.
— Chris D.
I hadn’t heard from Kathy in some time; it occurred to me that she still had a couple of hours of session time paid for and that this might be a good time for her to take advantage, so I got in touch and we had a session a few days ago. It turned out that Kathy had been having a rough stretch when I got in touch. Today, Kathy contacted me to share this:
I had a problem with feeling love for anyone. Now I have the love feeling back. Also I had stops in making money and now work is coming in without much effort again. Thanks for your help, Dexter.
– Love, Kathy
I wanted to thank you again for that session. I’ve come so far since then. I realized I was actually the one holding onto the shock of my brother’s death around me as a way to keep the grief at bay, and that was a huge job to keep up all day and night. Once I absorbed the shock, I was able to allow the process of grief to sort of flow through me. I would not have been able to do any of that without you so many, many thanks for your help.
I just had an AMAZING session with Dexter Gelfand. I VERY highly recommend him. Life changing. Thank you so much Dexter. I would like every one of my friends to experience your counseling.
— Talya Danielle
“Evelyn” lost her husband not a long time ago, and has been struggling to deal with it. She contacted me seeking relief, and I gave her a free session. A few days after the session, she sent me this message:
“Hi Dexter. Just a quick note here. Since our session, I definitely notice a lightness or lack of heaviness that I felt since (the time she lost her husband). I was around his friends the last couple of days and in talking about him, that extreme heaviness just wasn’t there anymore and it was nice to talk about him without it. There was also some kind of agitation that went along with that, which also is no longer there. I only recognized that because it’s gone. I am much calmer and more relaxed. Thank you.”
Thank you Dex! I think its amazing that I’ve found you, I’m finally building the life that I’ve been dreaming of since I was a young child! Thank you, Dex!
— D.D., Writer and performer
August 23, 2017
I’m feeling good since our last session; I feel calmer about making good decisions and my anxiety is noticeably reduced. I feel stronger with increased clarity.
I’m also realizing how much I withheld and denied my power by hiding inside my “failure” persona construct.
A.D. Is a writer and performer whose focus is on how to unleash the full scope of her creative potential, and so she is working to resolve every barrier and to gain full access to her creative powers and abilities, fully actualize her dreams. She has this to share in the past week:
“I believe that the idea that there is always something horrible to contend with is indoctrinated, I think that everything can be great, I really do believe that!
I think I finally understand that I have no need or reason to be insecure; I don’t have to justify my existence, I don’t have to be that person anymore, I’m done with playing that game! Wow Dex, I’m creating a completely different reality now!”
August 9, 2017