We assume the identities of our game selves in interacting with the game selves of others, to play the endless varieties of the games people play-
“get the most attention”, “make people fear you”, “be invisible”, “smartest guy in the room”, “shock people”, “get sympathy”, “get recognition”, “be mysterious and intriguing”, “dominate others”, “impress everyone”, “get the most accolades”, “make the opposite sex desire you”, “be safe”, and so on.
And the endless variety of game self identities-.
“tough guy”, “clever person”, “clown”, “aloof observer”, “witty person”, “downtrodden person”, “bully”, “abused victim”, “lonely guy”, “nasty character”, “loser”, “serious introspective philosopher”, and so on. Each of these is taken on to accomplish something, to make something happen, or to prevent something from happening.
Every persona shortly becomes automatically triggered rather than consciously engaged, and thus out of your control. We all tend to have quite a collection of strategic “game selves”, which are activated in the presence of the corresponding “game self”, the one that is engaged along with your game self in playing the game that both selves exist to engage in.
Once your game self identity is triggered, you yourself are no longer present and mindful; a game self is a substitute presence, thus suppressing your own presence. Any game self identity can only accept, or understand things in terms of the narrow parameters of the filters of whatever that particular game is, and so has poor judgement, and is bound to react inappropriately to the actual environment.
And the ultimate liability of any and all of your game self identities is that in the end, they always wind up preventing you from accomplishing the very purpose for which they are adopted. They are all ultimately very effective self-sabotage. Through the techniques Therapeutic Spiritual Counseling for addressing game self identities, you come to recognize this time and time again, with every each game self identity as they are addressed, and through the process, are deconstructed, restoring to you your own mindful presence, with which your purposes now can be accomplished, and you can enjoy being comfortable just being you.
No game self identity exists alone and independent of some game; rather it exists to interact with another corresponding game self identity. These continuing paired interactions perpetuate the game being played between them, and so the two identities, in interacting, reinforce each other.
Game self identities in being created are infused with a strong will to survive and persist. And being that they primarily define themselves by the conditions and situations that distinguish them from others, anyone’s game self identities are driven to display those conditions, so as to maintain their existence. The conditions and situations can be “taken advantage of by others”, “righteous indignation”, “knowing better than everyone else”, “always going along with other people’s decisions”, “being hurt and betrayed by their partner”, etc. Whatever the particular condition/situation of anyone’s game self identity may be, they are driven to always display that condition/situation; any game self identity will attract, provoke, create or pretend whatever condition/situation gets them recognition as being the person with that condition/situation, and thus maintains the existence of that game self identity.
This is the reason why you see people exhibiting the same life patterns again and again. You see someone you know repeatedly suffering through their latest iteration of being mistreated by their latest romantic partner, or losing their latest job “unfairly”, talking about the latest “idiot” that has them fuming, etc, etc. This is a game self identity of theirs asserting itself so as to continue to be.
There are many approaches and techniques in the world intended to resolve, unravel and deconstruct the spiritual architectures that are these identities, but few if any take into account these 3 qualities:
Differentiating between those identities that we take on and those that are imposed and projected onto us by others. These require different techniques to successfully and fully resolve.
Addressing both the game self identity that comes to mind first, and then addressing the corresponding, interacting game self identity. The rarely if ever known fact is that in any game in which we have engaged, and thus worn an identity in playing, we have also within us and activating at other times both, or all, of the roles, i.e. game self identities within that game. And so any complete technique for resolving identities must address, one at a time all the identities within that playing field.
The final step is addressing the game itself, after resolving the individual game self identities. Every time I’ve taken a participant through this step, the spiritual liberation and the positive, energizing changes that take place have amazed them. It is a profound and deeply life-changing experience.
Therapeutic Spiritual Counseling includes the techniques for fully accomplishing each of these steps.
Next day here. Still reading this 10X over….. still gobsmacked.
Thanks Juanita, I felt this essay to be particularly informative and enlightening, I’m glad you’re getting so much out of it!
Dex is the best! Love his work! X
This is indeed very interesting