If your sense of self-worth hangs on how well you know and apply rules and principles laid down by others, you need to not fear to find your own voice, or do so despite your fears.
Often in life, there are learning curves to be navigated, opportunities for education and edification in the ways that interest us, and these are often very valuable in our progress toward our goals. But there does come the point where we need to fully develop so as to express and create for ourselves, to transcend the system. As with music theory, a master eventually arrives at being able to “break the rules”, once understood well enough, to create something beautiful to the ears from what are supposed to be discordant musical variations. And as with color theory, you arrive as an artist once you can create expressions of shape, colors, patterns and composition that aren’t “supposed to work”.
Be willing to learn from every opportunity, but do not allow yourself to be limited to merely being an expression of what others have declared or imposed. Transcend the provided guidance to find your own voice!