Whether we understand it or not, we all have a tendency to play the role of the specific identities we assume in interacting with the specific identities of others, and in doing so, play the games that are the raison d etre for those identities. These generate no internal (or external) reactions unless we are invested in those particular games, as those particular identities. And that does carry the liability of things not always working out satisfactorily, which is, in itself, a condition that defines the identities in play.
Love, Dex